Monday, July 6, 2020


 I have had a hard time opening my Bible since my diagnosis. I had felt so completely alone and forgotten, searching for hope and peace and coming up dry. I have had days of sorrow and days of anger and questioning and doubt, days where I couldn’t utter any words of prayer and relied on the words of others. Trevor reminded me David, author of the Psalms, was there searching for peace and only able to rely on the promise God had given him. He shouted and prayed too// This last week my Grandma moved from her home into a new place. In the move some things went with her and others were dispersed amongst family. My Grandma’s Bible came home with my Mom. My Grandma is a prayer warrior, a faithful servant to her family, community and church. This Bible is full of highlights and underlines, notes and more. My Mom brought it over to me last night, believing during this season it could be helpful. I smelled it first, yes....this is hers, this is from her home where I have so many memories from I can’t count. I cried, knowing the years of faithful prayers and laments she has called out before God for her kids and grandkids and friends. I turned the pages searching for the truth I knew in my heart but my head had somehow forgotten. God is with me in this battle. God’s word is God’s word but this felt different in my hands, somehow even more sacred and anointed. A gift for this season. A reminder that God knows me, knows my heart and speaks to me even when I cannot feel or see or understand, because He knew I needed this. #honestpastortalk #krystlekickincancer


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