I did several things that I didn't think I would ever do, including going to two different countries without my family.
When I felt God asking me to be ready to just go wherever, I did expect some gigantic move across the ocean and a dirt hut. Maybe not that scene exactly, but I did expect some major shift. When a few months went by and no major changes in job or location happened I was pretty bummed. Sure I knew that it didn't mean God wasn't working, or that it always had to look big. But I really wanted it to.
God was definitely working, and I began to figure out really what I love to do and where I love to serve and kinda figure out what makes me tick. It was awesome. God was working in lots of little areas, but I've kinda always held out for something bigger. I am an optimist, and I'm a future dweller and dreamer, that's just who I am!
I started a devotional series at the beginning of the year (She Reads Truth//Hymns) it was short, just a 5 day series. It was based off of 5 different Hymns. The scripture behind them, a short explanation of why the hymn came about and then a devotional. It was fantastic and there was one that stood out to me and has continued to pull at me.
Tune my heart to sing Thy grace.
– Robert Robinson
Along with personal goals I've set for myself this year, this idea of "tuning" my heart to God perfectly melded and I felt God calling me to a season of tuning.
For the last two years it's been about going, and doing and stepping into the places He's called me out to. It's been incredible, but I cannot keep doing the big things if I am not doing the seemingly small things in my heart and home.
This year I want to focus on my home, this place where I spend all of my days and as we are fast approaching all three of our boys at school I want to make each moment home with them that much more focused and intentional. I want to find a rhythm that suits us and makes the most of our days. I want to lean into the graces of God like I haven't before, and soak up what He is wanting to do in me.
It's not that I don't have motivation to do other things, and I'm sure some will come along and I will need to look hard at them, whether a trip or a task. It's that I want to focus on what's going on inside of me and in my home and truly be even more intentional than I have been.
So, 2015 is going to be a year of intentionally focusing on my heart and my home. Tuning each part to the heart of God so that I can continue to step into the unknown with full faith and confidence in His calling.
If either my heart or my home are out of tune, my home being my priority and calling as a wife and Mom then I cannot be effective outside my walls. I can only do so much. I picture it sort of as a layering process. Each one needing to be exposed before you can move on to the next.
This isn't easy for a personality like mine, and I expect that's why God is having me do it.