We vacuum a lot, and spot clean. In fact, we have subsisted on this method for awhile and it had been fine, until it was obvious it wasn't. So I deep cleaned them.
This is the nasty that I got. This came up after one use in our living room. This is just so disgusting, it's embarrassing. It didn't look that gross at first glace, it was hidden down deep and it took more than a vacuum and spot clean to get it up.
As I looked at this bowl of nasty water, I realized how similar I can be.
I am really good at getting by, and doing what I need to do to function. I feel I do pretty good with some praying, some scripture and some time in worship. I don't feel I have any deep seeded dirt. I mean, I'm saved...I love Jesus and I want to live for Him.
I realized I had been doing this rather well. I spot cleaned and vacuumed
and moved furniture around in my heart. I maintained a facade of clean, tidy and only minor blemishes.
Some issues came up involving people in my life and my first instinct was that of anger and bitterness. My first reaction was not the grace and love I speak of and it shocked me. Sure, I justified it. It really isn't fair, it really is something that I can't control and it really is hurtful.
I could make a list of justifications for why it's okay for me to not give grace, or to show love.
But in doing that, I am being a hypocrite. I'm saying God's grace is good enough, except when...
His love covers all, except this.
I am made in His image. His Holy Spirit equips me with the same grace and love that HE offers, if I allow Him to.
And who am I? Who am I to pick and choose when I give grace. That is the exact opposite of what grace is.
This will forever be a learning process, until I meet my Savior face to face I will never do this thing right all the time.
I need Him to clean out the roots of my carnal self and I need to be honest with myself that they exist.
I can't do this one life well if I refuse to see myself for who I really am. A broken person who needs Jesus and His grace. Only then can I give grace out like there is no tomorrow....even when it hurts.
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