I couldn't have imagined the change that would take place in the first month of January and if this month is evidence of the year to come then I best hang on to my hat.
We are two days away from finishing up 21 days of fasting using the Daniel Fast. I had never done anything like it, and while the first 5 days I was
mean a little edgy and downright exhausted sleepy, after that I felt fantastic, increased energy and increased focus.
If that had been a diet, I would have failed around day 7 when a major change hit us upside the head and my natural instinct would have been to dig into some ice cream. But since it wasn't a diet, I didn't cheat or fail by one morsel.
Along with the fasting we are doing The Circle Maker's Draw the Circle 40 Day Prayer Challenge with a few other couples, and the fasting along with this specific prayer focus has been incredible. Our food fast is over, but we've chosen to fast from spending for the remaining 19 days like we did here.
I love that the 40 days ends the day before I leave for Haiti aka in 17 days. Gulp. No, the trip doesn't make me nervous (well, maybe the flying part) but leaving my sweet men is going to hurt a bit. But that's what I signed up for. The uncomfortable life. The life that screams this is not about me, and so I embrace the uncertainty and trust in the One who has called us all to live like this.
Most of you know my sweet man is the full time Worship Pastor at our church. Our church is just beginning a huge change that caught us all off guard and we are searching for a new Senior Pastor. This is a major and unexpected change. God knew all the while I picked that word and prayed it...that this was coming, only weeks into the year. He is faithful isn't He?
This means months of waiting and uncertainty and change and who knows what else.
What I do know? I know that we've never had control over anything, and we're not about to try and orchestrate things now. I know that church does not belong to any man, but to God and is used for His purposes only. I know that even greater things are on the horizon for our family and I feel like my bags are packed (metaphorically speaking at this point Mom, and Grandma) and I'm just ready to go wherever and whenever He calls. It's quite exciting actually.
To know that you have no control over anything, and yet you trust in this God who has your best interests in mind. What freedom in that!
So bring on the change. Not all will be good. Not all will be without sorrow and pain, but I know the end of this story and that is what I cling to.